The Greatest Website in Queens

The greatest website in Queens is the Sunnyside Food blog maintained by our buddy Mikolaj. It’s so popular that there’s a Tumblr site that mocks it. Now, I can’t speak much about the rest of Queens, but I can testify that it exists as a borough of New York and that there are restaurants and that this blog is the greatest website ever created in the borough. Queens is both next-to and not-even-close-to Brooklyn. I can testify to that too. It took us over two hours to get from Brooklyn to Queens thanks to a series of station closures, train cancellations, Sunday schedules, and good, old-fashioned ineptitude. Goddamn New York. We should have walked.

But we got there and found out that Queens is cute. Sunnyside is, as least. Queens is big — there’s a lot of it. There are a lot of restaurants too, like: Prima Sarabella, Los Verdes, Takesushi, Wild Turkey Pub, and 99¢ Pizza. We’re especially interested in 99¢ Pizza. How can it be so cheap? Can we eat there every day? Would they let us live inside and pay rent and sleep there? We need to find out.

We will return. We will have a slice of pizza that costs one cent less than a dollar. Can’t wait.